To Those Not Forgotten

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own “mission” that we forget we are only one in a group of many that have lost a child.  We forget that our daughter is not the only child who has lost a sibling at too young of an age.  We forget others in our quest to not forget our own.  Because every parent’s worst fear who has lost a child is that they will forget…. that they will not spend enough time remembering, that those flashes of memories that randomly come to them will become less frequent.

When I received a note from Amy Countiss it made me realize that I have been tunnel visioned at times, not recognizing others who have suffered similar loss.  Amy has frequently sent me messages of support and this time was no different other than she wanted to also offer encouragement and support to another family who have been doing this a little longer than I have.  Amy generously made a donation to Magnolia Son in memory of “your precious Christian” but also in memory of Spencer Perkins who would be celebrating a birthday in a couple of weeks.  I did not know Spencer or his family but I do know he touched many lives and had good friends and memories in Meridian.  I think Amy did something very special when she indicated she also wanted to honor Spencer’s brother Sawyer.  So many times we forget about the brothers and sisters who are left behind to carry on their siblings legacy.  A job they didn’t ask for but was given all the same.  In this case, I think Sawyer is making Spencer proud.

So I thank Amy today not only for the donation but also for her generosity of spirit and compassion that keeps her continuing to honor and remember “our” children.  And for her reminding me to not be selfish in my grief because I am not in this alone.  And to all those who read this and worry about forgetting…..

It’s hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember….